Immune Cells Slammed for Bigoted Response After Assault Charges

The two killer T-cells, arrested on assault charges, are being slammed for their bigoted response to Monday’s incident. The immune cells were knowingly videotaped claiming that they were just working to “keep things safe by fighting against foreign bodies” and that, “If they don’t do their job, it will start multiplying and take over.” The victim, who is only being identified as a virus, was disgusted by their lack of remorse but said it was recovering well and is in good spirits after the wonderful outpouring of support.